There’s No Such Thing as an Englishman: poems from an irritated England

“There’s no such thing as an Englishman.
He really doesn’t exist...”
What exists instead is inheritance, mixture, contradiction — and irritation.

This anthology of marks the many sources of irritation faced by the average Englishman or woman these days – everything from the railways to referenda via what ever it is the young call music these days.

It was launched on 31 January 2020 – the day when the UK left the European Union and when the phenomenon known as Brexit finally, we like to think, finally evaporates and all those years of frustration, anger, sheer disbelief and irritation all come to rest. But as Chairman Mao once said about what he thought the effects of the French Revolution were, it may be too soon to tell. It does not argue for or against Brexit. It documents irritation – personal, cultural, political – as a condition of modern English life

No Such Thing as an Englishman is a collection of poems written in response to…

• bureaucracy
• nationalism
• education systems
• work
• language
• fatigue
• Rooted in satire, not polemic
• Written by two authors, in two voices

Its two authors – Nick Owen and Janice Owen – have become accomplished at becoming irritated at many facets of life in England over the years and hope that you, dear reader, will find some solace in knowing that you are not alone when it comes to feeling frustrated, pissed off, angry or just good old fashioned irritated.Being English though, means we’ve just reached a level of irritation and aren’t quite ready to riot. Yet.

• → Essays & satire on the NOP Blog
• → Longer narrative work: Confessions of an Ageing Tennis Player
• → About Nick Owen Publishing (if you’re asking “who on earth is behind this?”)

Nick Owen Publishing exists to publish work that is reflective, slightly unruly, and resistant to neat categorisation. This book sits alongside fiction, diaries, and satire that ask similar questions about identity, ageing, and how we narrate ourselves.