by Lord Andy JPGR Murray of Kirkintilloch
The book that finally tells the truth — or at least a version of it
What happens when memory fades, ego inflates, and the last great sporting triumphs are reconstructed by a man who cannot be trusted with facts, dates, or even basic reality?
My Life as an Ageing Tennis GOAT is the definitive (and deeply suspect) autobiography of Lord Andy JPGR Murray of Kirkintilloch: four-time Grand Slam champion, club committee survivor, and possibly the greatest tennis player never to exist in quite the way he remembers himself.
Written in the voice of its self-appointed hero, and allegedly ghost-written by someone who knows better — this book charts a life spent chasing glory across Wimbledon, Melbourne, Paris and New York, before drifting into hospice corridors, drone surveillance, unpaid subscriptions, and the quiet terror of being forgotten.
A comic novel about sport, ageing, delusion, institutional power, and the stories men tell themselves when the trophies gather dust and the bar bills finally come due.
What kind of book is this?
- A satirical sporting memoir by an unreliable narrator
- A darkly comic meditation on ageing, memory and masculinity
- A send-up of British tennis culture, club politics and self-mythology
- A form-breaking novel, sliding between prose, screenplay, hallucination and surveillance footage
- A final reckoning with the question: what remains when the applause stops?
About the “author”
Lord Andy JPGR Murray of Kirkintilloch insists this is his story, told at last and without interference. The publishers wish to note that certain sections appear to have been reconstructed, contradicted, or quietly corrected by an unnamed ghostwriter who was present at the events — or at least nearby.
The truth, as ever, lies somewhere between the baseline and the net.
Praise for the Ageing Tennis Player books
“A glorious dismantling of sporting ego and British self-importance.”
“Laugh-out-loud funny, then unexpectedly moving.”
“The most unreliable narrator since memory itself.”
Perfect for readers who enjoy:
- Satirical sports writing
- Literary experiments with voice and form
- Dark comedy about ageing and decline
- British cultural self-mockery
- Narrators who are absolutely certain — and completely wrong
My Life as an Ageing Tennis GOAT
4 Grand Slams. One unreliable witness.
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